Tales of the Parodyverse

Post By

killer shrike offers some Wooster action with a little Langiappe
Sat Dec 25, 2004 at 11:18:14 pm EST
Subject
Here you go then:
Originally
I'm game if you two are.
In Reply To

Hatman
Sat Dec 25, 2004 at 09:44:01 am EST
<< Prev In Thread
[ Reply ] [ New ] [ Edit ] [ Email To Friend ] [ Printable ] [ RSS ] [ Tales of the Parodyverse ]
Next In Thread >>

Overheard During the Revels of Untold Tales #200



Trudi and Jenni Wooster sidled up to Miiri on either side, effectively blocking escape.

The smaller twin smiled winningly and offered the bikini clad alien a flute of champagne, “So, you’re not from around here, are you?”

“No. I currently reside in Lemuria, with my fellow former slaves Deela, Sayanna, Philaana, Noona, Odoona, Losiira, Luuma, and Kaara. Originally, however, we were born on planet Caph, located-”

“Is Visionary real or not?” Jenni blurted.

“Uh, I am unclear as to the nature of your question,” Miiri looked back and forth and the grinning blondes.

“The buzz is Visionary isn’t…. all natural, and since the two of you were intimate, my sister and I thought you might have some inside information as to whether that was true or not,” Trudi explained.

Jenni giggled at the word ‘inside.’

“Buzz? Oh, you wish to know if Visionary’s anatomy has been enhanced,” Miiri thought back, “Well, while we were performing quoz-lar, it did pinch my-”

Trudi interrupted, “You’ll have to fill us in on what quoz-lar is, dear. As a point of reference.”

“Or better yet,” Jenni handed Miiri her mascara wand and a cocktail napkin, “Draw us a diagram.”

Trudi looked away and spotted someone walking to them, “We’ll have to wait on the particulars, sister. The ex is heading this way.”

Indeed, the Sorceress was coming to join them, with an expression that could only be described as severe.

“Do you think if I dump my drink on her she’ll melt?” Jenni whispered cattily.

“I would not recommend testing that hypothesis,” Miiri cautioned before wisely excusing herself.

The flaxen-haired Legionnaire in the vintage French lace gown walked up to the twins and offered her hand, “We haven’t been properly introduced. I am Whitney Darkness.”

“Jenni Wooster.”

“Trudi Wooster.”

The Sorceress gave a slight smile, “I want to congratulate the two of you on finagling your way into this get together. Some of the most resourceful villains of the Parodyverse would have killed for the opportunity to get this close to us in a social setting, in hopes of catching us unawares.”

The twins cast each other curious glances. So far the woman wasn’t talking like a jealous former girlfriend they had expected.

“Thanks,” Trudi said cautiously.

“Now, from what I’ve heard both of you have your eyes on Jay.”

“Sir Jay,” Jenni clarified.

“Sir Jay. Right. Now, as you probably know, he and I share a history-”

“Oh, yes. The two of you were lovers, and nearly got engaged during the Technopolis Invasion, but then…” Jenni rattled off a long description of the couple’s relationship, mostly based on inaccurate tabloid gossip.

“The point is,” Whitney said with considerable steel in her voice, “Even though Jay and I are no longer together, I still care for him. I know he’ll hate having to embarrass or hurt a person’s feelings over some unrequited crush, and I certainly don’t want him hurt or embarrassed himself. Am I making myself perfectly clear?”

“Not actually, no,” Jenni said.

“She’s saying back off Sir Jay or she’ll turn us into toads or something,” Trudi sulked, “Right?”

“That’s as good an interpretation as any,” Whitney smiled now that her point had been made, “Enjoy the party.”

Once the Sorceress was out of earshot Trudi downed the last of her champagne and muttered, “Women like that take all the fun out of being a gold digger.”

****


“You’re offering me a rematch?” Mr. Epitome rephrased Shazana Pel’s proposal to him.

The woman in the black satin keyhole halter dress nodded, “Yes. It has bothered me that a warrior such as yourself has been denied an opportunity to reclaim your honor after such a humiliating defeat at my hands. Since this celebration is to end with the exchange of gifts, this would be my gift to you.”

The Paragon of Power’s russet skullcap and cowl, worn with matching dinner jacket, did little to conceal his mirth, “Really. That seems rather unnecessary, though. Perhaps you could consider another gift. The Caphans knitted me a nice scarf, for example. Maybe something more along those lines.”

The Thongarrian did not care for the suggestion, “You dare equate my proffer to something given by that slave race?” she spat, disgusted.

“It’s a nice scarf, done in checkerboard. And unlike what you’re suggesting, it is something that I can use,” Epitome smiled, “I don’t fight to prove myself, or to maintain my honor. I fight for the only reason worth fighting for: to win.”

Shazana sipped her drink, “To win what?”

“What I want. A safer, stronger world. You were a police officer on Thongarr, were you not? Isn’t that what you fought for?”

“Yes, but we did not sacrifice our moral code in doing so,” the Pigeon Warrior objected.

“Neither do I. And I must point out; it was your culture’s code that unfairly made you an outcast for merely being practical when it came time to save lives. I don’t see a lot of merit in such a value system.”

“I would not expect a Tool of the Man to have such a lack of regard for the laws a society is based on,” Shazana noted.

“I respect the law.”

“If it helps you ‘win,’” the winged warrior woman realized with some fascination.

Dominic Clancy just smiled and raised his glass to her.









cache-rtc-ad01.proxy.aol.com (152.163.100.195) U.S. Company
Microsoft Internet Explorer 6/Windows XP (0 points)
[ Reply ] [ New ] [ Edit ] [ Email To Friend ] [ Printable ] [ RSS ] [ Tales of the Parodyverse ]
Follow-Ups:

Echo™ v2.4 © 2003-2005 Powermad Software
Copyright © 2004-2005 by Mangacool Adventure