Posted by DONAR on May 11, 2001 at 01:34:18:
Dancer/Donar Special Edition #8
"Well?" The Wilde Huntesman demanded. "Make thy choice. Wilst thou run and provide mine dogs with sport, or shalt thee be rendered from thy limbs here?"
Donar stepped forth. "Huntesman. I would have thy ear for the nonce."
"Thou dares defy the laws of the Gods, Oldmanson? E'en thou must realise the dire consequences of such an affrontery.."
"Nay..not at all, Wilde one." Donar paused mid sentence. "I do call upon the right of Jjarlgefenr."
The Huntesman and his minions gasped audibly. "Thou wouldst invoke Jjarlgefenr for but a mortal?"
"And what of it, slayer of the damned? Art thou chicken?" Donar mocked.
Dancer pulled Donar aside. "Listen..Donar...what the Hel are you doing?"
"Pardon me, Huntesman...I must consult with thy prey." Donar apologised, before being dragged into the kitchen.
"OK." Dancer said, somewhat in shock. "I'm gonna be killed by that...thing..out there, aren't I?"
"Nay milady..I hast invoked the right of Jjarlgefenr." he replied matter-of-factly.
Dancer exhaled relieved.."Oh thank god, cause for a minute I thought..wait...what 's the rite? Is it where I say sorry and all is forgiven?"
"Um..not quite, milady." Donar explained, fidgeting with his gauntlet and avoiding her stares.. "Thou dost...choose a champion to defend thy case."
"Oh..so, we get someone to kick his ass, and then me and my champion walk?"
"Again milady..I art afraid not." Donar sat on the countertop. "If thy champion dost loseth the battle, thy life is forfeit."
"...and if he wins?"
"Then..thy champion shalt be slain."
"Oh. Good plan, Donar." Dancer said into her hands, that were now covering her face in despair.
"Hurry guys...we only have 24 hours to prepare." Enty yelled to spiffy and Finny. "This whole area has to be cleared for some battle Donar's having tomorrow." he added, gesturing towards the decrepit Parodiopolis Football Stadium. It had been treated as somewhat of a junkyard since one end had been destroyed by a stray Skree missile several years ago.
"Why didnt this place ever get fixed." Finny wondered aloud, throwing a rusted car-shell towards the pile they were making.
"Wasn't in the budget. It's a fiscal gerrymander..compendium.. thing. Trust me." spiffy replied in his best Mayoral tones.
At the other end Yo and Ziles made short work of the rubble that had been left of the aged impact.
"Yo is thinking Donar be brave for to be having fight for saving cute Dancer..but Yo sad worry that Huntyman is being not-cute and evil." Yo stated clearly.
"I think he'll do ok, Yo. I'm always suprised at what these guys manage to do when they have to." Ziles smiled as she watched Finny in his dragon form, flapping his wings to blow any stray debri to where it could be collected.
"So what's the deal anyway?" spiffy asked Enty. "Why doesnt Donar just kick this guy's ass now instead of needing a stadium..is it a Gladiator thing? You know what he's been like since we saw that.."
"Well, from the data I managed to retrieve.." Enty pointed out "It seems that the Wilde Huntesman is a little out of Donar's league. Not only is there a whole tribal law thing that will undo the God's heirachy if it's openly disobeyed, but there's a tribunal council that must observe any challenges and impart their decision upon them."
"So..it IS a Gladiator thing." spiffy concluded.
"Donar...this is crazy. If you win, you get killed instead of me? I'd rather not have that hanging over my head..or is it like a Thor Volume II deal where you just pop back anyway?"
"Nay milady.." Donar stated depressingly. "Mine death at the hands of the Hunmtesman art as eternal as mine Father's wisdom. Mine soul shalt be his to play with and ne'er shalt reach Valhalen."
"Crap. This is nuts, you can't do this." Dancer objected. "I'll give my life instead. The LoR need you...you're one of the only big hitters left on the good guys side."
Donar stood. "Milady. Ne'er wouldst the Oldmanson allow a comely wench, e'en thyself, to take his place in all the 34 levels of Hell. Tis mine honor bound duty to defend thee..and at any cost. But fear not. I doth haveth a plan.."
"Great." Dancer confided. "Not like ANYTHING could go wrong then."
"And so, Father.." Donar concluded after a lengthy explanation. "Thus dost mine plan conclude. Art thou in?"
Oldman looked down at his kneeling son with a furrowed brow. His beard moved as though his lips were searching for a suitable reply. "Mine son........ It must first be said that to defy the laws that hath existed long before us has ne'er been an option. Were the Huntesman to be slighted by such an act would surely bring us all verily pon eteranl damnation's door.."
Donar frowned. This was not helping...and time was running short.
"However.." Oldman continued. "Art laws not made to be tested?" Oldman let out a hearty laugh. "I shalt go along with thy plan..e'en for the merriment caused alone."
Huntesman and Donar stood face to face in the newly renovated arena. The surrounding area had been cordoned off by police, and homes evacuated, courtesy of Lisa and Cheryl's efforts. The stadium was filled with the white noise of cheering and screaming onlookers. Demons, trolls, Gods and even superheroes packed the stands to capacity, the majority calling for Donar's head.
In the member's area were Gail and Oldman, as tradition demanded. Oldman was allowed on Earth for rites of passage such as these, so there was no threat of a Celestian rebuke. Also in the stand was Dancer. She had spent the last few hours beforehand in Ausgard at Gail's and Oldman's insistance. She had drunk a strange amber brew and been adorned in white robes. "Tradition" was all Oldman would say, although she swore she saw his eyes twinkle.
"Donar Oldmanson." Huntesman began. "Prince of the Ausgardian Realms...art thou ready to rumble?"
Donar looked across the sand covered stadium area through squinted eyes. "It art said that 'Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back'....but thou dost face a God, Huntesman. I smile not." Donar leapt through thi air at his opponent, knocking the Huntesman on his back with a bellow and a flash of steel. The crowd roared in primal support.
"You fight well for a woman." Huntesman mocked. "But not well enough to spare one."
His fist struck under Donar's jaw, sending him through the air only to land at the other end of the field. Racing towards his winded opponent, Huntesman raised his flaming sword ready to strike again.
"He's gonna die out there!" Dancer yelled. "Do something!" she begged of Gail.
"Ours is not the right to interfere now, sweet Dancer. Trust your champion. He knows what he is doing." Gail replied, seemingly not bothered by the blood dripping from the gash along her son's side.
Again and again was Donar punched through the air, each time landing harder than before. "Submit." Huntesman offered. "And I shall slay you BOTH mercifully...eventually."
"Thou dost...." Donar spat out broken teeth. "Thou dost hit like a child weak of arm." Donar hissed. Huntesman's rebuttal was to break Donar's arm over his leg with a loud snap. Donar gritted his bloody teeth, swallowing the pain, not letting Huntesman have the gratifacation he was seeking. He rolled back, hefting Mjalcolm to his unbroken arm and smiting Huntesman in the side of the head, Mjalcolm's nail biting at Huntesman's skull.
"I grow weary." He declared before pinning Donar to the ground and pushing his head into the ground. "Tribunal!" He shouted at the angry sky. "I call victory over my opponent!"
The sky rumbled in agreement. It was time for Dancer to die.
Visz and Cheryl looked on in horror. "He'll get up and win. I know it. Or, he'll have some trinket like a Necklace of Eternal Winning hidden in his pocket..won't he?" Visz worriedly begged Cheryl.
"He's not moving...at all...I'm scared." Was all she could reply.
"Wench!" Huntesman bellowed. "I have defeated thy champion. Thou must now be slain, as per the law."
He flung his fiery sword at Dancer before she had a chance to react..it buried to the hilt in her gullet. She screamed for a moment, until it faded into a soft confused moan. There was no blood. No pain. Nothing. "Um..I've been run through, right?" she asked of Oldman. "I mean...there's a handle sticking out of my stomach and I can lean back in my chair, so...I know I've been stabbed...but.." She pulled the sword out slowly. No wound.
Huntesman stared on in disbelief. "Thou cannot...thou...thou must die!" he spat like a spoilt child.
"Nay..not if it doth breach thy beloved laws. " Donar bled. "Thou can only slay the mortal chosen to be slain, hunter.." He added with a victorious smile. "Dancer art for this moment a Goddess....beyond thy murdering hand."
Huntesman laughed deeply at Donar's scheming. "Thou art a good opponent Oldmanson. Well done indeed..to have been tricked by mine own arrogance is mirthful indeed." He smiled. "I shalt give thee thy pardon, Dancer wench. Thou need not fear my return."
Huntesman retrieved his sword and vanished in a ball of flame, as Gods have a habit of doing.
"I'm a Goddess? I don't want to be a bloody Goddess!" Dancer exclaimed to Donar, now bandaged up and recuperating in his bed.
"Tis a transitory state, Dancer. " Donar reassured her. When the Godmead dost pass through thy system, thou shalt be mortal again. Until then, enjoy thy newfound strength and relexes."
"Oh I will...but I better be back to normal by tomorrow." She replied. "Or I'll break your other arm."