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Dancer
Fri Nov 19, 2004 at 08:50:08 pm EST
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FINAL THOUGHTS: "Didn't You Know?" - A Confusion in Nine Acts
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FINAL THOUGHTS: "Didn't You Know?" - A Confusion in Nine Acts

Previously:

UT#160 - Untold Tales of the Lair Legion: A Possibly Fake Romance by the Hooded Hood
Second Thoughts by Visionary
Third Thoughts by Dancer
Lunch at Kirby Lee's by Visionary
When Titans Kibitz by Killer Shrike

The possible romance after Visionary’s secret date with Lair Legion sentient computer intelligence Hallie is complicated when Dancer mistakes Lisa for Vizh’s mystery woman, and Yo concludes that Visionary has got Lisa pregnant. Actually Lisa is sneaking in some private workouts with Lair Legion leader Sir Mumphrey Wilton. Oh, and just so you know, I think all of this happens before Follies of Youth and the Transworlds Challenge, because it makes a lot more sense that way. Now read on…


Prologue (and can I just say how classy I feel having a prologue )

[The Scene: The Lair Mansion, at some point where Trickshot happens to be walking past the hall phone when it rings and gets to it before Hallie can pick up.]

Trickshot, answering call: Lair Legion HQ, home of the Parodyverse’s sexiest and most available archer and a variety of other supertypes who really don’t hold a candle to the big T but hey they’re only human. How can I direct your call?

Dr Mortensten: Er, can I speak to Visionary please?

Trickshot: Vizh, really? You’re a guy so I figured Lisa for sure, or maybe Dancer…

Dr Mortenson, Dean of External Student Affairs at Parodiopolis University: I can speak to Lisa if Visionary’s not there. I have the test results.

Tricky: Test results? We were tested?

Dr M: Not you as far as I know, Mr, er, Trickshot. No, I mean the results of the tests Ms Waltz and Visionary submitted. About their youngsters?

Tricky: Their what?

Dr M, who’s been marking the Juniors’ exam papers: Can you just tell them that the results are as they feared. They’re going to have a lot of work to do over the next nine months or so.

Tricky, who’s already heard the Lisa/Vizh romance rumour from previous chapters: They are?? So you’re saying Vizh and Lisa are going to have…

Dr M: This is really confidential. Visionary seemed sure the results would be positive this time. I hope he’s not disappointed.

Tricky: Whoa! No, I guess he’ll be… well that’s just…

Dr M: I hope it won’t be too much of an upset. I know Lisa was hoping to be in a different position in the future.

Tricky: Yeah. I guess you have to watch that kind of stuff if you’re expecting, even when you’re as flexible as she is. I’ll be sure to let ‘em know, Doc.

Dr M: Tell them I’ll e-mail over the formal results but I wanted to give them early warning.

Tricky: Hey, did you use a plural? You said youngsters, as in more than one? How many kids are we talking about?

Dr M: Didn’t you know? I’m afraid we’re talking about four. But the dog’s not going to be a problem.

Tricky: The dog? Boy that Lisa gets around, doesn’t she? And Vizh is… you’re sure Vizh is responsible?

Dr M: Ms Waltz was pretty definite who was to blame when she submitted the tests. You’ll pass on the news?

Tricky: You better believe it, Doc. Thanks for calling. *puts down phone, takes a deep breath*

Tricky: Wow. Yo!


Act One:

[The Scene: The Lair Legion is clearing up after they big battle with the Yurt. That means Nats gets to do heavy lifting while Hatman talks to the cops, CSFB! talks to the crowds, and Epitome talks to some top-secret guys via global satellite surveillance. To anybody else he’s talking to himself. And Lisa is getting people to sign a big box of damage waivers.]

Asil, Lisa’s nicer, younger clone: Does it not bother you at all, getting people to sign away their compensation rights?

Lisa, amorous advocatrix and the unsuspecting not-mother to be: It does a bit. Do you know how much fee I rake in on just one civil lawsuit?

Trickshot, hurrying over hastily: Hey, hey Lisa don’t you be lifting that heavy box of papers. Leave that to ol’ brer Tricky,okay. Can’t be having you straining yourself, can we?

Asil, watching the carry the box off after Lisa: Do you suppose Lisa’s been putting in some “extra training practise” with Tricky, by any chance?

Yo: Oh, is not to be that. Well, probably not to be that. Didn’t you know? Is just – and I should not be to be telling you this, is big secret – but is Lisa to be pregnant.

Yo: Asil? Asil, should you be to going that colour?


Act Two:

[The Scene: The office of Sir Mumphrey Wilton, most moustached leader of the Lair Legion ever.]

Mumph: I say, Asil m’dear, are you feeling all right? Not sickening for anything, what? Only you’ve been dashed quiet all day, and your mind’s not been on your work.

Asil: Sorry. I know I keep dropping things. I’ll try harder. It’s just… dropping sickness. Yes, that’s it. Dropping sickness. It’s… I just had a shock, that’s all.

Mumph, scowling: Tell me what Flapjack showed you this time. I swear I’ll flay the bounder!

Asil: No, it’s not that. I could use a good laugh right now. I just… Sir Mumphrey, what relation is someone to their clone-donor’s baby?

Mumph: Young Christopher? I’d say you were his aunt or his brother. Don’t marry him when he grows up and you should be just fine. And remind me to send of a stern note to Debrett’s about them putting out a chapter on proper forms of clonal address, would you?

Asil: I was thinking about my relation to Lisa’s new baby.

Mumph, going stiff: Her what?

Asil: Didn’t you know? Apparently the big doody-head’s got herself pregnant again. Well, not got herself pregnant, I suppose, although there is some predatory pond-slime that can actually do that. I imagine she had enthusiastic help, but still…

[Sir Mumphrey drops his teacup and rushes out of the room]

Asil: Sir Mumphrey! Stop! I was only making up Dropping Sickness. You can’t really have it!


Act Three:

[The Scene: Lisa and Amber St Clare are meeting with government liaison Herbert Garrick to go through his latest set of complaints when Sir Mumphrey bursts into the room.]

Mumph: Miss Waltz. I need to speak with you immediately.

Garrick: Oh no! We’re not rescheduling this meeting again. I’m not having you worm out of…

Mumph: Ms St Clare. Mr Garrick. Out!

Garrick: I’m not leaving this room, Sir Mumphrey, until I get…

Mumph: Right. Into the cupboard then. This way. *Frog-marches Garrick into closet and locks him in*

Amber: Sir Mumphrey? What on Earth has…

Mumphrey: Don’t wish to be impolite Ms St Clare but it’s the hallway or the closet. Which would you prefer?

Amber: Locked in a closet with Garrick? I’d call the UN War Crimes tribunal. *Hastily exits*

Lisa: Gosh, this new perfume is really something. I’ve got to get me a crateful.

Mumphrey: Miss Waltz, it has been drawn to my attention…

Lisa: Ah, then that’s this new wonderbra.

Mumphrey: About your current condition, I mean.

Lisa: Well, I could use a nooner, sure, but I could have lasted until I’d crushed Garrick like the worm he was.

Garrick, muffledly: Hey!

Mumph: Ms Waltz, I’m trying to ask you something important. Something that will change the course of all our lives.

Garrick: Even me?

Lisa & Mumph: Shut up!

Lisa: So what did you want to ask, boss-man? Will I need to go get special equipment?

Mumphrey: Didn’t you know? Miss Waltz, will you consent to be my wife?

Lisa: ……

Garrick: He said…

Lisa: Yes, I heard him. He asked me to marry him. And it’s not like he was even trying to get me into bed with him. Well, not for the first time.

Mumphrey: Will you, Lisa?

Lisa: The bed, sure. The marriage, I don’t think so Mumph. I’m not cut out for monogamy. Even polygamy’s a bit restricting for me some days.

Mumphrey: But if I’m responsible for you being…

Lisa: Don’t flatter yourself, Mumph. We’re not exclusive, you know. You don’t have to be “responsible” for anything. We’re two consenting adults. I practise consenting all the time, and I’m world class at it.

Mumphrey: Then there’s… it’s somebody else’s?

Lisa: “It” as you put it, is mine, and if I loan “it” out then that’s entirely my concern. Look, your proposal is very sweet, but I can’t accept. * Sees Mumph looking confused and downcast * It means something that you asked though.

Mumphrey: Hmph. Just didn’t want you to be alone with no-one to help you this time.

Lisa: Oh, you’d be amazed at the gadgets they have to help out these days. But still, c’mon with me, I’ll show you how impressed I am you’d offer.

[Mumph and Lisa leave]

Garrick: Hello? I’m still in here. Anybody?


Act Four:

[The Scene: The Bean and Donut Coffee Bar, as mild-mannered waitress Sarah Shepherdson answers the phone]

Hallie, downloading over the wire: *appears*

Sarah: Hallie! I did not know we had installed your holo-projectors here!

Hallie: Enty was bored one day waiting for his cappuccino and he modified the condom machine in the bathroom.

Sarah: Okay. That explains the screaming sounds coming from the back alley recently.

Hallie: Give me a strong black coffee with extra coffee to stare at, please. I want to get good and gloomy.

Sarah: Okay. But you’d probably be better off telling me what’s glooming you!

Hallie: Love is glooming me, Sarah. Love is a pile of ashes and a pit of everlasting regret.

Sarah: Well sure, the morning after. But the night before when the guy’s still being charming it’s absolutely wonderful. Er, have you just…

Hallie: I just found out that Sir Mumphrey Wilton asked Lisa to marry him. Er, not that I was eavesdropping or running anything but a random sensor diagnostic. *blushes* And Lisa turned him down.

Sarah: She turned Mumph down flat?

Hallie: Well, some kind of horizontal from what I couldn’t avoid seeing before I shut my eyes and purged my system.

Sarah: Poor Mumph. And I bet he thinks it’s because she doesn’t care for him! The poor guy doesn’t suspect the truth.

Hallie: The truth? What truth? There’s a truth?

Sarah, hastily: No, no truth. Tooth. He… he doesn’t suspect that Lisa turned him down because of dental problems. Her tooth.

Hallie: Your cardiovascular signs just spiked, and your skin perspiration levels have elevated by 4%. Either you are lying or an unsuitable potential boyfriend has just walked into the diner.

Sarah: Damn you, Sherlock Holmes! Okay, but you can’t tell anybody. The reason Lisa won’t marry Mumph is that she’s pregnant.

Hallie: But… if Mumph is offering to marry her then he must be…

Sarah: Apparently not. Didn’t you know? The reason Lisa won’t marry Mumph is because the father… is Visionary!

Hallie: Visionary? Our… the regular Visionary? Yellow trenchcoat, improbable eyebrows and the ability to turn any simple situation into a complicated mess?

Sarah: He was in here just a few days ago beaming because he was in love. I’ll say this, Hallie, I’ve rarely seen a guy look more… Hallie? Hallie?

Hallie: *vanishes*

Sarah: Hey! Hallie? Are you okay? Hallie? What about my tip?

Sarah: Aw, I never get to spend holo-money anyway.


Act Five:

[The Scene: Visionary’s Condo. Visionary is holding Kerry’s purse with tongs and gently lowering it into a bucket of water.]

Kerry: Life sucks. I have no personal freedoms.

Asil, smugly: I do not think anybody has the personal freedoms to carry semtex explosive to the shopping mall.

Kerry: I was hoping to get mugged. Boy, there’s one criminal element who’d think twice about snatching a handbag again.

Visionary: Could you two bicker quietly, only I think the purse has started to tick again and I really don’t want to drop this.

Hallie: *Materialises in front of Vizh*

Vizh: Aaaagh! *drops handbag*

Hallie: Why is everybody diving behind the sofa?

Asil: It was a dud. We are not all dead.

Kerry, checking soggy purse: Marzipan. Damn. I’ve been gypped!

Visionary: Hello? CPR please.

Hallie, remembering what she came for: Visionary! You slime!

Asil: What? Hallie?

Kerry: See, that’s what I’ve been saying but nobody listens. Thank you!

Vizh: H-hallie? Have I done something?

Hallie: Oh yes, you’ve apparently ‘done something’. And a few months from now poor Lisa will have to face the consequences!

Vizh: Is this about that letter to the Law review about standards of conduct in judge’s private chambers, and the cost to the taxpayer of getting kool-whip off judicial robes? Because I’m pretty sure whoever sent that didn’t sign it.

Hallie: You know what you did, you hound! And now Lisa’s pregnant!

Asil: Yes, I know. But… wait a minute!

Vizh: How could me sending a letter be responsible for…?

Asil: Are you saying… Vizh… and the Doody-Head?

Vizh: Vizh and the Doody-head what? Hallie…?

Kerry: Eew. No, I refuse to think about it. I’m going to my happy place. * Heads off towards her weapons locker * No way. No. Denials-are-us. Never happened. La-de-da-de-da-de-dum.

Asil: Visionary… how could you! With the Doody-Head! Anybody but her! There are farmyard animals that would have been better than her! Plankton!

Vizh: How could I what? Hallie, what does she mean? *Looks mournfully at the dud explosive* If only it had gone off.

Asil: Don’t speak to me! *Bursts into floods of tears and rushes off*

Hallie: Well? Satisfied now?

Visionary: What do you mean? I didn’t do anything!

Hallie: Ooh, that’s low, denying all responsibility like that and leaving poor Lisa to cope! I expected better of you, I really did!

Vizh: Hallie, I think I’ve just slipped into a parallel dimension. I do that sometimes. What do you want me to do?

Hallie: Don’t you know? You should go and marry Lisa, that’s what you should do! Don’t speak to me till then! [Hallie blinks out]

Vizh: ????????

Soggy handbag: BOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!


Act Six:

[The Scene: Asil’s bedroom at the Lair Mansion. Sir Mumphrey Wilton calls to check that his assistant is feeling better]

Mumphrey: Miss Ashling? Just thought I’d check that you were feelin’ better, what? Didn’t want you to… Asil, what’s the matter?

Asil, tearfully: Nothing. Everything. Visionary.

Mumph: Visionary? Has some harm befallen him? *gallantly hands Asil his perfectly-folded hanky*

Asil, honking into linen: I just found out about him and Lisa, that’s all. About him being the father of her child.

Mumphrey, reddening: He what?

Asil: I don’t understand. He is a Great Man. How could he do it with that Doody-Head?

Mumph: Ah, well… yes, y’see chaps have needs, is what you have to understand. Needs. Yes. And Ms Waltz splendid woman in many ways, absolutely, wouldn’t blame a chap… Only natural… But… Ms Waltz and Visionary! No wonder she wouldn’t… well, no matter. I shall have to congratulate the happy couple, shake young Vizh’s hand. Best man wins and all that. When’s the wedding?

Asil, shuddering at new nightmare: No, no wedding. Vizh won’t marry her. He won’t!

Mumphrey, scowling: Won’t? Won’t! The bounder! Excuse me for a moment, Ms Ashling. Need to go find my service revolver. No, need to find my service rifle.

Asil: Sir Mumphrey? Why do you need your… Sir Mumphrey?

Mumphrey: Back shortly m’dear. Just need to go have a chat with somebody on a domestic affair.


Act Seven:

[The Scene: The Conference Room. Amber St Clare has finally soothed Special Agent Garrick with biscuits and apologies and Lisa is back at the negotiating table, as opposed to across it]

Garrick: And then as soon as the senators had come out from behind the sushi bar CSFB! dropped the whole mess down onto the President’s lap and said…

Hallie, blinking in as a hologram: Lisa, I need to speak with you.

Garrick: No, that wasn’t it. What he said was, and I quote…

Hallie, crossly: Shut up, Garrick, and get out!

Garrick: No, although that it was a bit similar and with more rude words.

Hallie: Right, that does it. In the cupboard, Bad News Herb.

Garrick: Again? He wait, you can’t…. Mmmmmppphhh!!!

Lisa: What’s this all about, Hallie? Not that I mind a bit of Garrick abuse, but…

Hallie: I heard about Visionary’s attitude! I’m so sorry Lisa. I never thought he’d back away and let you down like this.

Lisa, who’s been half-expecting Vizh to try and slide out of looking after the juniors ever since Dr Mortenson’s e-mail about the exam results: So, he’s looking to sneak out of his responsibilities is he? He thinks he can just slip off and leave the kids in the lurch?

Amber: He won’t? The slime. Dancer is right about men.

Garrick: Hey!

Hallie, Lisa & Amber: In the closet!

Lisa: Well Vizh can think again. He’s responsible for this mess and he can help to sort it out. He was pleased enough when I let him out of the closet.

Amber: Vizh was in the closet? I never realised he was…

Garrick: I’m in the closet right now, and I want to come out. Er, but I’d like to rephrase that please.

Hallie: I feel as if I’m missing something.

Lisa: Garrick’s closet admission? Which, by the way, we’ll be discussing in more detail when the negotiations start up again later.

[Sound of head thumping in closet]

Amber: Aren’t we missing Visionary doing the right thing?

Lisa: Haven’t we been missing that ever since he gave back that Do-It-Yourself Seppuku set I gave him for Christmas ‘98?

Hallie: Don’t you know, Lisa? We all know about you being in trouble, about the test results. And we know Vizh is responsible.

Lisa: Damn straight he is. And now the little weasel’s trying to weasel his way out of standing by the kids, the weasel? Who else knows what he’s pulling?

Amber: Well, I found out from Nats who’d had it from Uhuna who heard it from Cressida who got told by Mindy and she got it from Al B…

Lisa, wrathfully: That weasely little fake worm! I’ll crush him! Excuse me ladies. I have a man to eviscerate. Well, Visionary at least! *storms out*

Hallie and Amber: *follow*

Garrick: Hello? Locked in a closet again? Hello? Oh my life sucks.


Act Eight:

[The Scene: The Lair Gym, where Dancer is working on a new routine that will once again fail to impress theatre casting directors across Parodiopolis]

Asil: Dancer! There you are! Help!

Dancer: If that Flapjack has been trying to show you his collection of warts again…

Asil: No, it is worse than that! I think Sir Mumphrey has gone off to shoot Visionary!

Dancer: Is he late with the Juniors’ grade papers again? I knew Mumph was threatening to get tough, but this…

Asil: No, didn’t you know? He found out that Vizh got that doody Lisa in the family way and he is going to demand that Visionary marries Lisa. On pain of pain. No matter how he might have erred, we have to stop poor Visionary suffering a fate worse than death as Mr Waltz.

Dancer: Uh-oh. We’d better get over there. To the Dancermobile, Asil!

Asil: Um, you don’t have a Dancermobile, Dancer. You can’t drive.

Dancer: Damn. Well then, it’s a good job there will happen to be a taxi waiting at the gates for us. Run, Asil! Otherwise we’ll miss the gory bit!


Act Nine:

[Visionary’s Condo, where Vizh is putting the fire out on his eyebrows and still trying to figure out what hit him]

Visionary: Maybe I have a concussion. That would be nice. A concussion would be a relaxing thing to have. I would like a concussion.

Sir Mumphrey, hammering on the door: Open up you bounder, you blaggard!

Vizh: Me? No, I’m not those things. They sound rather too English. And also I am out.

Mumphrey, shooting the lock off and storming in: Out, are you? Not facin’ up to your responsibilities. Stand up like a man so I can shoot you like a dog!

Lisa, sweeping into the room: Don’t shoot that man, Mumphrey. First I want to beat him to a pulp.

Mumphrey: Hmm. Seems reasonable. Very well. But afterwards I get to shoot him.

Visionary: Concussion… concussion…

Lisa: Try and get out of taking care of the kids, would you? Not willing to take responsibility for your actions!

Vizh: Er, is this because I gave Nats and Uhuna fifty bucks to take the Juniors to the movies? Because otherwise I’m still thinking I’ve slipped into the Twilight Zone. Or maybe Bizarro-Condo?

Hallie, blinking in: Still trying to worm out of it, are you? You’re not fit to be the father of Lisa’s baby!

Lisa: ???

Asil, running in next: Don’t kill him, Sir Mumphrey. He was led astray by an evil woman! Lisa probably seduced him, the man-hunting lecherous insatiable raptor that she is. Not that I’m judging.

Dancer: And you were so happy together for a while, you crazy kids. What went wrong?

Mumphrey: He turned out to be a bounder, that’s what.

Lisa: Time out. I’m mad at Vizh because he’s trying to sneak out of getting the Juniors ready to retake their test papers. Aren’t I?

Amber: And because he got you pregnant and wouldn’t look after the quadruplets too.

Vizh: ………… There’s no place like home, there’s no place like home…

Lisa: Vizh? Get me pregnant? How did you get to that conclusion?

Dancer: I’m afraid it’s common knowledge now, Lisa. Everybody knows what Vizh did to you.

Mumph: Hmph. He’s no gentleman.

Lisa, getting angrier: Vizh claimed that he and I…? He told you…?

Amber: Well, men can’t help bragging I guess.

Lisa, glaring at Vizh: “Get me pregnant”, would you?

Vizh: What? Me? No, I never… Honestly. It was probably an alien clone evil double. Or spiffy. Or Nats. Statistically it was probably Nats.

Mumphrey: Disgraceful, lyin’ like that. *rifles shotgun round* Say the word, Ms Waltz and I’ll shoot him like a dog where he stands.

Asil: Shoot Lisa if there’s a choice! Or lend me the gun!

Lisa, to Visionary: Hold still so I can clobber you, you lying weasel.

Hallie: …seem to have had a lucky escape. When I think I nearly…

Dancer: …try to recapture those happy feelings that you told Sarah about at the diner…

Amber: By the way, did anyone let Garrick out of that cupboard?

Kerry: Hey, I’m trying to watch some TV here. Could you kill Vizh quietly please?

Visionary: Help! I’ve definitely been sucked into the Twilight Zone. I may be a two-part series finale!

Yo, pure genderless thought being who happened to be passing: Hello everybody! What is to be being all the fuss about?

Everybody: …just burst in here… lying hound… horsewhip the blighter… great have fallen… time for healing… if there’s going to be a lynching can I light a bonfire…

Yo, smiling: Ah, Yo sees. Now Yo is to be understanding of situation.

Everybody: You do?

Yo: Is to be easy. Is all Yo-fault.

Hallie: You got Lisa pregnant?

Lisa: I’m not pregnant. Only Vizh said I was pregnant.

Vizh: I never said you were pregnant. Honest. How would I know? I don’t even subscribe to your pay-per-view cable channel.

Mumph: But Asil clearly said that Visionary had fathered Lisa’s baby.

Amber: And I heard it from Nats who’d had it from Uhuna who heard it from Cressida who got told by Mindy and she got it from Al B…

Dancer, quickly: I don’t think its necessary to try and unpick all this casual gossip really, is it? So tedious. No need to encourage a blame culture, really. It seems that someone – let’s call him spiffy – clearly got the wrong end of the stick, that’s all. Lisa isn’t pregnant.

Vizh: And I didn’t get her not-pregnant either. I mean…

Yo: Yes. Some peopling are to be thinking that Lisa is to be dating of cute Visi. But is not to be, yes?

Lisa: It’s not morning sickness but I feel nauseous now.

Visionary: I think she devours her mates, actually.

Mumphrey: Hmph. *blushes*

Asil: The Doody-Head… and Sir Mumphrey?

Mumph: Well, a gentleman never tells.

Lisa: But wait for the next volume of my memoirs, people. It’s a doozy.

Asil: I’m okay. I’m in my happy place.

Kerry: Well get out of it fast. My happy place was full so I stored my land mine collection in yours.

Yo: Happy places is not to be working like that!

Dancer: Hold it. So Lisa was talking about dating Sir Mumph, not Vizh. And Vizh was talking about dating…

Hallie: Nobody. He was talking about nobody at all. Vizh… Vizh makes things up. We all heard him pretend to be getting Lisa pregnant. Right? Right.

Vizh, confused but gallant: Yes, I make stuff up. Sorry. Dateless, that’s me.

Kerry: Ha! I knew it!

Lisa: Hold it. So you all actually thought that I’d sink as low as to sleep with Visionary.

Vizh: Hey! I’m right here.

Lisa: I mean, half the population of the planet’s male. And some of the women are more attractive to me as well. And maybe certain higher primates.

Vizh: Hey!

Lisa: And you thought… *chuckle* And people were helping with my lifting… *snort* Mumphrey was being so gallant… *laughs* Bwa-hah-hah-hah-hah!

Vizh: Wait. All this was because you thought I’d… with her? That’s why I nearly got married at gunpoint? To Lisa? *burst into laughter too*

Dancer: well, I guess this is the point in the story where we all laugh at the misunderstanding.

Everybody: *laughs*

Lisa, rolling about: I mean, Vizh and me… Hahhahahahahahahahaha! Vizh… hahahah… and me…

Vizh: You could stop laughing any time you want now, you know.

Yo: So, to be summarising: Is Mumphrey with Lisa but no pregnanting. Is Visi not with Lisa and also not pregnanting. So is Mumph not to be having to shoot Visi, and is Lisa not having to flay Visi, and is Hallie not having to not talk to Visi, and Visi is back to being cute-Visi and we are loving of him, yes?

Mumphrey: Absolutely. Um, except for the cute part. But he’s certainly a jolly good chap. Apologies on wanting to shoot you like vermin, that man.

Kerry: Don’t you think we should shoot him like vermin anyway, as a precaution?

Lisa, wiping tears from her eyes and trying to get her breath back: He can live this time, I suppose. That’s probably the best revenge I can take.

Hallie: Yes… he’s not what we thought at all, is he? He’s… more than that.

Dancer: Wow, everything’s worked out. What were the chances? *stops dancing*

Kerry: Hey, can we still throw him on a bonfire at least?

[You just know this still isn’t the end of this romance stuff, right?]




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